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It’s been a minute since I updated this blog! So much has happened. April 14th was a Saturday, we took our daughter to an indoor playground and then to her favorite restaurant for dinner. We had a great day, doing everything she would love to do. That night when we got home the neighbors were having a really big party. I couldn’t sleep and had really intense heart burn that night. My stomach was hard and I was pretty uncomfortable. At 5am I could have sworn I pee’d in my sleep. But the wetness seeped out and I had no control over it. I got up and used the restroom, and pee’d. That was confusing since I thought I had just pee’d. Anyway, was too tired to investigate further and went back to bed. At 7am it gushed again and I was pretty sure by this point that I broke my water. Off to the hospital! What an experience, as usual I am overall pleased with the care I received at Kaiser.
Fast forward: He’s here! All 8lbs 10oz of him!
How are we all coping? Oh I am head over heels in love. I’m over the moon. He is everything I could have hoped for. The daughter? A little jealous at times but very happy and very involved. The dad? Proud as can be.
I feel so full of hope and joy. I love being a mother. I am so grateful and happy. I can’t wait to have more.
I absolutely adore my daughter and my brand new son. So lucky <3
Had a moment of weakness this morning. It was pretty hot over the weekend and we stood out in the sun waiting for Maddison’s Easter bunny photos. The two days of warmth really took it’s toll and by Sunday evening I had a really bad headache that went into this Monday morning. I made a few frustrated text messages and cried on the phone to John (my brother from another mother). Sometimes you just need to complain. Not to say you’re ungrateful for the blessing, but just being honest about the process. I feel like that’s important. What is this? 1950 and we need to sugar coat everything? The whole thing is hard, and it never gets easier. But we do it, because it’s one hell of an adventure.
Anyhow, I am totally lagging on thank you cards and I feel real bad about that. We were poured on at our baby shower. I mean, completely lucky to have all we do and to have such amazing people that care about us.
I totally underestimated how tired I was before I started this blog. More later, goodnight!
I hate to complain. This is what I wanted. I knew what I was signing up for. But here I am at 37 weeks (38 on Saturday) and I have to be completely honest, I am in a lot of pain. Mostly my pelvic bone, there is so much pressure on my pubic bone that walking and getting up and down is really hard for me. I don’t like being limited in movement. I am incredibly reliant on other people to lift things and I will have to ask my mom to bathe Maddi from here on out. I can’t be on my knees and bend over a tub while washing her hair and all that stuff. I really hate that, I want to take care of my own kid. But it hurts to do it. I believe that this baby will be bigger than Maddi. He has to be. It can’t just be a difference in the way I’m carrying this one, it has to be that he is bigger. I do not remember being so uncomfortable before. I wonder if it has anything to do with the fact that I am almost 5 years older this time around. But I was significantly lighter this time around and was in much better physical shape. Did these things help me at all?
I do notice that I want Maddi with me more now. I am too tired to take her to school, yes but that’s not it. These are my last days with her and her alone. She is the reason I would ever have another baby. The hopes that he will be even a fraction of how amazing she was, is enough. It’s like how heroin addicts continually “chase the high,” she was my high and I will chase that forever. She is such a good girl. I want to give her everything, everything I had and everything I didn’t. She deserves it all.
I had a prenatal massage today at Burke Williams. Shit was just what the dr ordered. Totally made my day. I woke up feeling really battered and broken. My spirits were down. Physical pain is easier to deal with than emotional pain for sure but it’s been this way for the last month. Constant struggles with every move I make. Trying to sleep is near impossible. But that massage really brought me back fresh for the fight. I am ready for this guy to get on out of there. I want to hold him and be able to MOVE again.
Anyhow, I think I might actually sleep soon. Tomorrow will be a good day. I will make it good. We have our tour of labor and delivery over at the new Kaiser building. The one Maddi was born in has since been torn down. Pretty excited to see the shiny new one!
This past Sunday we gathered at my best friend’s house to craft. I’ll save pictures for the party so you can see it all set up and prettified. The group of us got a lot done and it was really fun! I was so tired at the end of the night and my feet started to swell. I haven’t had too much swelling with this pregnancy which is a great sign.
Today I got to spend the day with my husband. We had lunch at Buca di Bepo. I have never been there before and I would probably go back. It’s rare that he is down to just store hop with me but thank GOD he was in the mood today because I was just running on empty. It was pretty hot last night and I had a lot of trouble sleeping. So today’s warm weather had me zapped! It was really nice to spend alone time with him. Things have been really good and it makes me want to be with him all the time. The closer I get to having this baby, the more I want him to be around me. That doesn’t necessarily mean I want him in the room while I’m in labor. Just because I want as few people seeing my junk as possible. Preferably people I’ll never have to see again. Ya dig?
My cousin has been using cloth diapers. So far she really likes them. Her daughter is 3 months old going on 4 and since she has had a good amount of time with these diapers I want her to explain the world of cloth diapering to me. It never occurred to me that cloth was even a valid option. But knowing that she has tried them and has been very successful, I am intrigued! So I added a bundle starter set from gDiapers to the registry to see how it goes. If we end up liking them I’ll donate all the disposables we get to the Union Rescue Mission.
I figured out the reason why Maddison looks so much like Theo. God gave my baby her father’s face to protect him. I could never harm him or hold hate in my heart for him because he looks just like my baby! If I could change one thing about Theo, I would make him totally excited to rub my feet. It’s like my favorite thing in the world. He has no idea how good it makes me feel.
I had a prenatal appointment yesterday. I really like my doctor. She seems young but not in a bad way. Is it inappropriate to suggest a wine session post delivery? Probably. She seems pretty confident that I can deliver VBAC this time, actually it’s more like she’s pushing it. (Vaginal Birth After Cesarean) Which is cool, because after 2 c-sections you don’t have that option anymore. He is currently laying sideways, I’m pretty aware of where his head is most of the time. It is big and round and pushes on me so much I can see the bulge.
I was editing items on our registries and noticed someone has ALREADY purchased our crib bedding. Target has this SUPER cute blue and green space ship crib set and someone bought it for us! I burst into freakin tears man. I seriously have the best group of people around me. I feel so awkward and uncomfortable about asking for help or letting people do stuff for me (I don’t know why? I feel like I don’t deserve it? Something weird like that) but when it happens I get so overwhelmed and then the tears. Like a crazy person.
Sleeping isn’t great. I am uncomfortable most of the time and I wake up every 3 hours, to pee or stare at the wall. But the countdown to baby #2 has begun! I can see the finish line! Hope is on the horizon! My wine party is in view!!!
Oh but for sure for my dirty 30 which is this August, momma will be in Vegas.
Had an ultrasound scheduled today! This one confirmed the Dr.’s suspicion. He looks big. I am going to be 31 weeks on Saturday. HOWEVER, he is measuring 35 weeks. Ultrasounds aren’t 100%, he could be a normal sized baby right on track (I hope). The Dr. also thinks things look good for a vaginal delivery. TMI? Yeah kind of. Kaiser has this form I need to fill out and bring over to my next appointment. My birth plan. Birth plan? Ummm… we do whatever we need to do to get this baby out of me. That’s my plan. Well, since last time there were all kinds of interventions, I’m going to do my very best to show up to the hospital IN active labor. I don’t want an induction, if I need to be induced might as well just schedule a c-section because in my experience, that was the very worst part. Long drawn out waiting game, several doses of Cervadil and you don’t even want to know how they give you that stuff! To lead up to extreme contractions. It was a Tuesday-Friday process, and I never got to pushing. So, if induction is necessary… let’s just cut the torture part out. But we’ll see, I can’t even say that for sure. I don’t like pre-planning this. It gives me a false sense of control over the situation. Maybe that’s what it’s for. It really is an out of control experience so I guess the facade of control might help people?
So that’s where I’m at. Everything is gold right now, except the whole big baby part. She did also tell me that I had a mild case of pre-eclampsia, the highest my blood pressure ever read was 140/90 and that in the 4 years since I gave birth to Maddison, treatment for my condition has changed. Now, I would not have been given magnesium. I wonder what else would have gone differently. But that’s all behind us now. We are on a good path. Yesterday I walked at the gym for 30 minutes. It sure isn’t easy. After 10 minutes I get this weird pressure on the front of my pelvic bone. Nothing painful and no cramping or contractions. I guess it’s just the weight of the baby shifting.
Hopefully I get to walk tomorrow, Maddison has allergies again. Theo is off work and I have a late Valentine’s day surprise for him. That is if he cooperates.
During my first pregnancy I reached weights that I have never seen in my life. Numbers that shouldn’t be associated with a 5’3 human female. I also had pre-eclampsia at 39 weeks of pregnancy (39 out of 40, you’re considered term at 37) and was then induced since the only currently known cure for this condition is delivery of the baby.
I knew that one day I wanted to have another baby, complications in my personal life along with being very overweight had to put those plans on hold. The timing wasn’t right with school and full time work going on. The stars aligned and a path was lit up for me. I lost 80 pounds, my husband and I began to work out the issues, took care of some classes, got laid off from work and sent my daughter to pre-school. Now there was way too much time on my hands. Fast forward, I’m 7 months pregnant.
Now don’t get me wrong, when I’m pregnant, it is one of the only times I appreciate my body completely. My shape is supposed to be this way, my body is doing exactly what it was designed to do. I don’t have to hold in my stomach. I love being pregnant for all these reasons. However, when you have lost so much weight and for the first time in your life you’re wearing size 14 skinny jeans and headed to a 12, going back to stretchy leggings is disheartening. I appreciate this time “off” of nazi style counting calories and hardcore working out 5 times a week but I am excited to get back on that horse and be the healthiest mom I can be.
I believe there is a difference in this pregnancy and I attribute it to where I was at physically when I got pregnant. I have had little to no swelling in my feet. I don’t really remember when the swelling began last time but I know it was towards the very end. I expect to see more swelling around 8.5 months, I hope it stays away for as long as possible. Swelling or edema is a sign of pre-eclampsia. Sure, SOME swelling is always going to happen but I’m on the look out for any signs. I’m trying to hard to limit my salt intake, it isn’t too bad since this time all I want is ice cream, cookies and cakes.
I’m trying not to get bummed out about my growing belly. There is a very important package in there. I am excited about sleeping on my stomach though.
Planning is in the works. I am excited! It’s going to be so fun! Oh man, I can’t decide between Thai and Filipino inspired BBQ!
OH! We had our 4D photo shoot for the baby dragon this past weekend. It was pretty fun! It was nice to get together and have dinner with everyone afterwards. Just as I had hoped, he looks like Maddi-cakes!! :)
Happy mommy!
Every time I sit still I wait to feel him kick. I’m getting to know his rhythm and when I’m active he wont move around for about 15 minutes after I settle down. Then suddenly he’s bouncing off the walls in there. I’ve got to say that being pregnoid the second time around. I felt him much earlier in my pregnancy. I am very aware of him and I feel like he’s going to be just as amazing as his big sister. This is really new for our family. I’m technically an only child (I do have an older half sister and a younger step sister but I wasn’t raised with them) and my mom only had me, obviously her daughter. Well, I have no experience with babies other than my own. I never babysat anyone’s babies or changed a diaper before my daughter was born. Getting used to a baby girl was a walk in the park. I’m so excited to watch my mom and I with a baby boy. I know for sure Theo will do great. He was wonderful with Maddi when she was little, he knew how to comfort her and was never afraid to change a diaper. His sisters have children so it’s nothing new for him.
He just stopped kicking, wore himself out and went to sleep I think.
I love being pregnant. I love being a mother. I’m so in love with it all.
